Season 1, Episode 5 - "Caravan Club"
Written By Terry Cartwright (Jay's Dad)...
You’ve met my boy Jay, right? Hair like Rod Stewart, face like Rod Hull. Sometimes I look at him and think "how could he have come from my balls?" Well unfortunately he did. Every month I drag Jay off to a Caravan Club meeting in the hope that he might finally pull one of the many birds there, but he doesn’t have much luck. I keep telling him, "there's only a couple of things you need to work on son – your face and your personality". I'm only joking...
he also needs to work on his hygiene. He stinks. Anyway, this weekend Jay is bringing his mates to the Camber Sands meeting, so maybe he’ll get to go sloppy seconds on anything they tug.
He already says that he’s lined up a bird called Becky for his mate Simon, but I don’t think she’ll want to shag Simon after she’s seen that shitty little yellow car he drives. Maybe one of the others’ll get something, that Will looks like a certain type of bird might go for him – blind birds.
Anyway, I’m desperate for a dump, so I’ll see you later.
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